Lost Beginning

I’ve started working at Ties of Blood (book three in the Amaranthine series) and here is where I reveal the dark truth: there is a very, very rough draft of it and the fourth book written – as one giant LONG book that will have to be broken in half (long story) and large portions rewritten. Personally, I think rewriting is harder than writing it the first time!

In the course of my reworking (okay, let’s be honest, in the course of my opening the document and looking at it) it’s become apparent that the opening paragraphs have to change because – drum roll – I used the same kind of intro for Legacy of Ghosts, and so I need something new. But, it was pretty snazzy, so I thought I’d share it, anyway.

WARNING: SPOILERS

If you haven’t read Legacy of Ghosts yet then read at your own risk.

Okay, I’m taking out the one sentence that is the hugest spoiler. There’s still little ones though.

****************

Blood.

Blood and fire.

A silver sword flashed and heart stopping screams rent the air, cutting into Katelina’s ears.  Jorick held her hand but when she looked again he was gone. Faces leered at her from the shadows; the ghosts of those now dead.  Michael, Patrick’s vampire brother, screamed death threats while Claudius, the former leader of a vampire coven, taunted her with all the things he could do to her and had already done.  Adam and Nirel, henchmen of a dark vampiress, waved a bloody knife and demanded that she scream for them while a vampire child watched from the heart of flames. His sorrowful eyes luminous and quiet. In front of them  stood the dark, ebony skinned Kateesha, laughing. Her voice was honey as she hissed, “Where is Jorick to save you now?”

“Katelina?”

The voice that cut through the nightmare was deep and soothing, like being wrapped in a warm blanket after you’d been outside in winter’s chill too long. But, it wasn’t enough to end the dream. Kateesha laughed and the fire disappeared, morphing from the basement of the small house where Katelina had first met Jorick and into the final, subterranean strong hold of Kateesha.  ….

“Katelina,” the voice was louder, more insistent. “We’re almost there.”

The dream drifted away like a vaporous fog and left behind a sticky residue of unease.  Slowly, the backseat of the small car came into focus, and she found herself staring into a pair of deep, dark hypnotic eyes.  Jorick sat next to her, one arm wrapped around her shoulders, the other hand resting on her arm. Despite the fact that it was December one of the car windows was open and the chilly wind played in his long raven hair, the locks dancing casually behind him. His eyes, so dark they were almost black, were rimmed in thick lashes and accented by a pair of heavy, perfectly arched brows. His smooth skin was pale and flawless and had the look of finely chiseled marble while his full lips were drawn back in a smile, revealing a pair of gleaming vampire fangs. He was beautiful and perfect; her immortal lover.

“What?” she muttered sleepily, stretching her arms and battling a yawn.  Reality and the world of dreams were still a disjointed mixture for her.  It didn’t help that her dreams were twisted memories of the past all tossed together into a terrifying jumble.  The cold air caressed her cheeks, coercing her into wakefulness. “Sorry, I must have fallen asleep.”

*******************

Hyum. Now to come up with something different that has fewer adjectives….

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9 Comments

  1. When you live in the nightmare world. Thats when you start having all the nightmares. Poor girl.

    Reply
  2. Its an excellent start, but i see what you mean about not wanting to repeat yourself.
    People always want something new

    Reply
  3. Good beginning. Too bad it has to go 🙂

    Reply
  4. bonnie mutchler

     /  December 21, 2010

    too bad I’m you again lol. No wonder we have identity crisis’

    Reply
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