*Profanity warning (it’s Micah, are we surprised?)
Hello! My name is Loren and I’m from Joleene Naylor’s Amaranthine series. Using state of the art-mumbo-jumbo-author magic, Jo usually has Katelina interview other authors’ characters but now we’re finally interviewing fellow Amaranthian’s. Even better, the questions come from you, the readers! How cool is that?
Loren: As I mentioned, I am filling in for Katelina because I wanted to. It’s about time I got to do one of these interviews. That Verchiel guy has hogged way too many of them. Anyway, today I’m interviewing none other than… *drum roll noise* Micah!
L: *snickers* So, you ready to answer questions because there’s a bunch of them… though some of them are kind of similar.
M: Lemme guess, it’s chicks wanting to know if I’m single, right. Well, honeys-
L: Um, no. Actually it’s kinda like… well… it’s mushy stuff. Not like romantic mushy stuff, but-
M: Oh, just spit it out, kid!
L: All right. Like Sharon asks, “What are you hiding behind all that macho bull shit? Who hurt you?”
M: Ah. *regains composure* Pfffttt. Who says anyone hurt me? I’m just macho, you know? I’ve always been pretty damn tough.
L: Well you had to be. After your master just dumped you like that.
M: Well… yeah. I was tough before that, though. But yeah. Look at that. Some weak ass punk woulda just rolled over and whimpered in the corner, but not me. No sir, I got off my ass and fuckin’ figured this shit out myself. You can’t always rely on someone else, ya know? They just let you down and, fuck, even if they don’t they won’t be around forever, anyway. I mean look what happened to Benjamin. Everyone thought he’d be around forever but no, he got whacked-
L: Who’s Benjamin?
M: What the fuck? Are you serious? He was this – he was this crazy vampire who owned a motel. We used to go play poker with him sometimes and he’d fucking take big ol’ swigs of booze and spit the shit in a bucket. Talk about disgusting! Jorick and them stashed Arowenia at his hotel and when the bitch pulled her shit-
L: Ah, he’s the guy who got killed.
M: Damn straight. He’s the reason I joined up with this pansy ass war in the first place. I wanted to beat the fuck outta that bitch for it!
L: That kinda goes with Donna’s question. “Your personality is so different from Jorick and Oren, so why do you hang around with them?”
M: Hey, yeah it is! I don’t hang out with them – fuckin’ ex-Executioner dog and his boy wonder. Eh, I suppose Oren ain’t all bad. He’s had some shit, you know? But I was hanging out with Herrick and Des and Benjamin and them until this mess. Des and Oren were buddies – or actually Torina and Des were, if you get my drift, and so he was helping Oren out, and that’s how Benjamin got dragged into it all. Since then I’ve just been enjoying the ride.
L: Amy asks, “Do you remember anything from “before?” You seem to be a pretty complex guy (the anger issues, along with the intense loyalty), makes me wonder what your human life was like.”
M: You want a biography, sweety, come see me after class *winks* Eh, I was living over in New Jersey in a shit town fixin’ bikes at Lo Dog’s shop. Dog was pretty all right and he was fuckin’ huge, man. Seriously, one look at him and you’d have shit yourself, he was that scary. Then some money went missin’ and a course since it was me, Dog and Dog’s piece of shit son Trick workin’ there, you know who got blamed. Wasn’t nothin’ new, though so I said fuck this and left town. That’s when I ran into him and got turned into this.
L: Juli says, “I’m fascinated by tattoos. There’s always a story behind the ink. What’s the story behind your tats?”
M: Now there’s a decent question! Well, see the mermaid over here, Left arm? She was the first. Fuck, I was seventeen and drunk outta my mind, so this guy Carl I was hanging with says to me, “you got virgin skin, we better fix that” and drags me to his uncle’s house, right? Well turned out his uncle was a tattoo guy. Well, he used to be. Lost his license over some bullshit. Anyway, so he did her. He also did this one here, right above her. See, it’s two moons, right? Like the crescent moon here on the bottom, then the full moon here on top, and then you can’t see the fuckin’ new moon, so there’s nothing for it. But it’s like the phases of the moon, coz even back then, man, the night time was way better than the fucking day time. Then this thing over here on my right arm that looks like a fire ball? Yeah, so I was working at this bottling plant, right, bottling soda. Well there was this idiot there – Curtis – fuck, can’t believe I remembered his name. Anyway, Carl and I had split by then so this dude Curtis says he can lay ink. Yeah, well guess what? He fucking couldn’t. Made such a mess I had to pay someone to try to cover it up and this was the best they could do with it. Not that he was much better. Shit. Carl’s uncle was way better than that clown.
L: What about the one on your face?
M: That was the last one I got. Lo Dog and I went in on my birthday and got this. It was like a fucking statement, you know? All these guys got these tear drops and shit, meaning that they killed someone or did time in prison, or whatever, like that makes them tough or some shit? Just coz they got one don’t mean they ever really killed no one, and just coz someone ain’t got one don’t mean they ain’t fucking killed a dozen people. So I say look at this shit and tell me what it means. It don’t mean shit. It’s just a bunch of wriggly weird symbols that some tat guy came up with. Though if someone asks me about it in a way that pisses me off I fucking tell them it’s part of the cult I’m in. *laughs* shuts ‘em up every time.
L: This seems like a good place for Sue’s question, “Not only who hurt you but why are you always so angry?”
M: Fuck, honey, I ain’t angry. You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry! Ha! *pokes Loren* You ever see that? Incredible Hulk. Now that was the shit.
L: I dunno. I like X-men better.
M: X-men? No way! Too much whiny bullshit!
L: No there’s not! And Wolverine is way cooler than some huge green guy!
M: Huge green guy? Man, at least get the name right! Fuck, you got a lot to learn kid! But come on, what’s the next question.
L: All right! Jonathan says, “I bet deep down you are sensitive. It’s okay, but appearances are important, right?”
M: Sensitive. Pffft. Yeah, my ass is sensitive. What’s with this? First I got anger issues and now I’m sensitive!
L: That’s because you are. Deep down you’re like a widdle cuddly teddy *dodges fist* Call X-men whiny bullshit again, will ya, asshole!
M: Just get on with it, ya’ whussy-wolverine-lovin’ nit wit.
L: There is nothing wrong with Wolverine! He’s awesome! From Donna, “You are so kind to Loren. Have you adopted him as a little brother?”
M: I’m gonna un-adopt him in about three point o. Ah, what can I say. The little punk needs someone to look after him, and that prick Jorick ain’t doing such a good job.
L: Eh, Jorick’s not that bad.
M: Says you. I say he’s a royal douche. His type always are; know-it-all jack asses who think they can scare everyone off just by lordin’ over their great ancient fuckin’ age and their status. *in high squeaky voice* “Oh, look at me! I’m a thousand years old and I got a shiny necklace! Whoo-hoo! Run in fear!”
L: You better watch it. If Jorick hears that he’ll kick your ass.
M: Him and what army, huh? What else you got, boy?
L: I have one more from Donna, “Micah, you tease Katelina so much, but let’s face it, if given the chance you’d want to be the one to change her, wouldn’t you?”
M: Ha! Why not? As I said, Jorick can’t even manage this punk *points at Loren* and we’ve all seen what he did to Oren. He’s got no idea how to raise a fledgling. Let me get my hands on Lunch for a month and I could turn her into a real vampire. You wouldn’t even recognize her when I was done, guaran-fucking-teed.
L: Uh, You better not let Jorick hear you saying that either.
M: *snorts* Like I said, him and what army? So that it, or what?
L: Yeah, that’s all of them.
M: Good deal. Then here’s where I say that we’ll see you next week when it’s Loren’s turn to sit in the hot seat and my turn to ask the questions.
L: Katelina’s not going to interview me?
M: Fuck no! It’s my turn, punk.
L: I’m not so sure that’s a good thing…
If you’d like to leave questions for Loren, please check out this blog and leave them in the comments section. Thanks!
- Interview with Jorick (joleenenaylor.wordpress.com)
- Interview with Katelina (joleenenaylor.wordpress.com)
- Interview with Verchiel (joleenenaylor.wordpress.com)
- Interview with Patrick (joleenenaylor.wordpress.com)
- Interview with Claudius (joleenenaylor.wordpress.com)
- Interview with Oren (joleenenaylor.wordpress.com)
- Interview with Malick (joleenenaylor.wordpress.com)
- Interview with Jamie (joleenenaylor.wordpress.com)
- Interview with Torina (joleenenaylor.wordpress.com)