A Chance to Win a Copy of Vampire Morsels & Shades of Gray!

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Donna gave 101 Tips ten Rubber Ducks – check her post to see what I mean!

Fellow author DM Yates has been kind enough to post her reviews of Vampire Morsels Short Story Collection and 101 Tips for Traveling with a Vampire on her blog. On top of that, she is offering a prize pack of a copy of Vampire Morsels and Shades of Gray to two lucky commenters delivered straight to your Kindle – no download codes or fuss. To enter, check out her blog and leave a comment – it’s that simple!

While you’re there, be sure to check out her other posts and her debut novel Always which I would  list as one of my favorite reads in 2012!

 

101 Tips… Revamped!

It’s been two years since I published 101 Tips for Traveling with a Vampire. At the time I expected it to have ten downloads, but since then it’s had over 27,000. I’m sure when it comes to free ebooks that’s not an astronomical number, but since it is getting downloaded I thought it might be time to give it a polish.

101 Tips for Traveling with a Vampire – Revamped features a new, shorter intro that plainly tells potential readers what the book is before they download it. I’ve also replaced the free “preview” of book 2 with a sneak peek of book 4 (which still needs a title! Eek!). The biggest change is that I added Jonathan Harvey as a co-author.

Eh?

Jonathan actually came up with about a third of the tips (previously uncredited)  because in 2010 he was feverishly finishing up his Unusual Christian Devotional, Shades of Plaid, and the two seemed at a cross purpose. But, since we’re now working on a vampire Willy book (we have some pages! Really!) I don’t think the association will do him any damage and it might even build up his vampire credibility.

With listing him as a contributing author, we also added in a free sample of Shades of Plaid. I know, it’s not very vampirey, but it will do until we get a chunk of vampire Willy ready to go and then we can swap that in, instead.

Just what is 101 Tips for Traveling with a Vampire? It’s just that, a list of 101 Tips for traveling with a vampire, though many of them can be used as travel tips even if you don’t take the undead along. It’s not a novel. It’s not a short story. If you want those then check out my Amaranthine series or my Vampire Morsels.  But, if you’re looking to kill ten minutes for free and get a sneak peek at book 4, then give it a shot.

On Smashwords

On Amazon

(The new version will filter down to Barnes & Noble, etc. in the next couple of weeks)

 

Who is Your Audience?

My 101 Tips for Traveling with a Vampire is still free on Amazon. I’ve given away over 11,000 copies of it and though I know those numbers probably aren’t much in the scheme of “real” authors, it’s mind boggling to me. Up to now I’ve only ever managed to give away and/or sell 437 through Smashwords and all of its markets (Barnes & Noble, Kobo, etc). I guess this shows the importance of being on Amazon, too. That’s not to say that I don’t think Smashwords will catch up to those kind of numbers or that people can’t do fantastically well there, I just think that if you do minimum advertising (like I do) it makes sense to have the book in as many places as possible so  more people are likely to stumble on it.

Of course, with free has come the bad reviews, but they’re mixed with good ones, so not too big of a deal. The bad ones mainly seem to be from people who expected different genres (One lady has reviewed only romance novels besides that book) or else expected it to be longer, despite the fact that the description says it is exactly what the title implies.  No fault to them, though. They just didn’t like it. Not everyone can. But then, I’m not really writing for everyone, anyway.

Which leads me to a point – not “my point”. “My point” is right on top of my head, which makes wearing stocking caps hard – hahahahaha! Get it? See, now not everyone thought that was funny. But, I digress.  The point is that I’m not writing for everyone, I’m writing for “my audience” and, as Ruth pointed out in a post on SPAL earlier this month, that’s the most important thing. I guess I’m just lucky in the fact that “my audience” is probably ten eleven people.  So long as they like it, then I’m happy because they’re the ones I have in mind as I’m writing or editing.

Does that make me short sighted?

And who exactly is this audience of ten eleven people?

Without naming names, I will say that most (though not all) of them like anime. They also generally find my jokes funny, or at least pretend to.  And the female portion of said audience seems to like pretty boys. They also tend to like the alpha-get -your-hands-dirty-in-the-blood-of-your-enemies kinda guys.  It’s even better if they can be that AND pretty at the same time. Oh, and men who take care of their women (much to the chagrin of some of the more radical women’s rights kind of readers). I firmly believe that women can do anything they want to and are capable of the same things as men, but frankly, why should they spend their time doing it all if they don’t have to? If the guy wants to take out the trash – or protect the damsel in distress from a horde of blood thirsty killers – I don’t see how that diminishes her as a person. Let him handle some of it. We don’t have to do it all just because we can. It’s not a contest.

Also, my target audience of ten eleven people like some gore or violence in between their romantic moments, seem to enjoy stretches of conversation as well as the odd overly dramatic setting (the old warehouse I compared to a bloody eyed monster in book 1 springs instantly to mind) and they like vampires that don’t sparkle.

Frankly, they sound like a fun group. No wonder I’m writing for them!

So here’s a big thank you to my audience, I believe you all know who you are.  And also a thank you to those of you who are in my audience without my realizing it. After all, if you’d asked me last year I’d have told you my audience was only about five people, so there’s plenty of room for growth.  Heck, I’ll even say thanks to those people who aren’t in my audience at all and left scathing reviews on Amazon.  Some of those reviews are so bad they’re good. And isn’t that what we’re all striving for?

You can check out 101 Tips for Traveling with a Vampire on Amazon and Smashwords

(edited per the comments below – thanks Juli!)

101 Tips for Traveling with a Vampire Free on Amazon

Get 'er while she's free!

Amazon sent me a notice about this a few days ago and I completely forgot.  So, fast forward I hopped onto Amazon tonight to check my sales and had over 3,000 for 101 Tips. Considering I haven’t sold any of those for the last two months, I immediately though “this is a mistake”, and then I remembered the mail from Amazon and it made sense.

Of course, free means I’m not making any royalties off those sales, but I don’t mind since it’s already a free book at Smashwords, anyway, and would have been free on Amazon if they allowed for it.

Right now you’re asking yourself “WHat’s the point of this post?”  It’s to tell you that if you haven’t gotten 101 Tips for Traveling with a Vampire from Amazon, now is the time to do it coz it’s a freebie, and we all love a freebie!

If you don’t have a Kindle, you can still get it for free on Smashwords as a document or PDF. it’s only about 9,000 words total, including the preview of Legacy of Ghosts, so it’s not too bad to read on a computer screen.

Black Friday/Cyber Monday Book Sale

The New Website is Up!

Officially announcing the new JoleeneNaylor.com – it is finally finished and online!

So what’s new about the site that makes it so exciting?

The navigation has been cleaned up with the use of sub-menu,  so it’s easier to get where you’re going, and there are some new sections – including the Legacy of Ghosts section where you can get all the info, read chapter samples, see character bios and get html code to help spread the word about the book.

101 Tips for Traveling with a Vampire also has it’s own section now, including a free sample and the bonus tips for Living with a Vampire; helpful ideas no matter your relationship with the undead is.

There is also a new Cover Art Gallery, and the short stories and flash fiction have been broken up into their own pages to better accommodate the growing archive of  free reads.

All together, the site took longer to program than we anticipated, but I think it was worth it. What I want to know is what YOU think! Go take a look and let me know your opinions.

101 Tips for Traveling with a Vampire : Special Sample

Here’s a special sample of 101 Tips for Traveling with a Vampire!  You can get the full copy at Amazon Kindle for $.99 or at smashwords – where you can set your own price!

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101 tips for traveling with a vampire
**********************************************************
Who am I? Well, who are you? Who are any of us? Whoa. That sounded all creepy philosophical, didn’t it? Ugh. I think I’m going to start over.
So, who am I? My name’s Katelina and, no, you may not call me Kately. It’s a stupid pet name my mother used when I was a kid and I hate it! Worse, she’s still determined to use it, even though I can see my thirtieth birthday looming on the horizon. (Well its, not THAT close, but its close enough.) So, what makes me interesting enough to think anyone will ever read this? How about that I spend way too much time with vampires? That got your attention, huh? The word vampire tends to do that. Even better, I’m kind of dating one. Sort of. I think.
It’s complicated.
Speaking of vampires, the more I look around, the more I see that the vampire “trend” is waning. Only a couple of years ago, vampires were everywhere, but now its zombies. I wonder what’s with all the zombie hype?  I mean, zombies? Please! That’s just stupid! Everyone knows there’s no such thing as zombies, right? Unless it’s something to do with vampires. Maybe zombies come from a botched turning attempt or something. You know, that might actually make sense. Vampires are popular, so everyone goes out to find a vampire and get “inducted” and then, say they botch the turning process and – boom – person is now an undead vampire with a rotting mortal body who is desperately sucking the blood out of people’s brains. I think I might be on to something, here. I need to ask Jorick about that. (In case you don’t know, Jorick is the vampire I’m – um, well, it’s complicated.)

……………………………………………….
……………………………………………….
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101 Tips for Traveling with a Vampire


**************************

1. Vampires don’t sparkle in the sun; they burn to a crisp. And putting sun block on them won’t help.

2. But, just because your vampire friend doesn’t need sunlight, doesn’t mean that you don’t. You should try to get a little sunlight every day, even if it just means sticking your head outside.

3. If you’re into trip photography then you need to invest in a camera with a bright flash, a tripod and/or a good night lens. Otherwise, when you show off your vacation snaps, it’s going to be even more boring than usual.


4. If your photos do come back indistinguishable, don’t force people to look at them anyway. Regular vacation photos are boring enough, but blurry, black ones are even worse. Yes, even if you play the “guess what it is” game.

5. Vampires don’t go into “blood lust” and turn into a beast every time they feed, anymore than you turn into a ravenous animal at every meal. The whole thing is really boring to watch and you’re better off staying behind at the motel and watching TV.

6. Like a reptile, vampires who haven’t fed are only as warm as their surroundings. Do not attempt to snuggle one in extreme cold. You will be sorry.

7. Make sure that you get away from your vampire and their creepy, undead world frequently.  You need to keep in contact with normal living people, otherwise you’re going to end up being weird and scary.  Do you really want to find yourself saying, “Yeah, this stuff is way overpriced. Someone should find the manager and rip his heart out”?


**************************

LODGING


8. Hopefully, your vampire isn’t too cheap to spring for motels, but, if money is tight, you can save cash by staying with his friends. If you have to sleep in a coffin, try to go for the old wooden style ones. They’re least likely to be airtight. You don’t want to suffocate, after all.

9. Depending on the season, you might be able to save money by camping. But, remember, it’s pretty hard to get a coffin in a tent.

10. Motels will not give you a discount because your friend is “dead”, so don’t ask.

11. If you’re in the middle of a vampire war, as opposed to traveling for fun, it’s best to find motels with individual, outdoor entrances to the rooms. This can make for a faster getaway and, besides, it’s a little hard to explain to management why there’s an attacking horde in the hallway, after all.

12. Before you snuggle down in that motel bed, do a mental check to see where the sunlight is going to be come morning. After all, who wants to wake up to a bed of ashes? Your vampire should be smart enough to handle this, but it never hurts to double check.

13. If you have money to spare, a room with two beds can be a safer bet because the second bed in a double room is farther from the window than the single room’s bed. Remember, sunlight is bad.

**************************

PACKING & HYGIENE


14. When you’re preparing for your trip, remember to pack light. You never know when you might have to run from an attack by enemy vampires, and it’s easier to run without bulky luggage.

15. When packing, use a duffle bag instead of a suitcase; a duffle bag can double as a pillow, but a suitcase is very uncomfortable to sleep on.

16. If your trip is for leisure, then be sure to take along some paperback books – or a laptop –  for those sunny moments while you’re waiting for your friend to wake up.

17. If you, or your vampire, happen to be in the middle of a coven war, then it might not hurt to invest in a folding shovel. Contrary to popular belief, vampires don’t turn to dust when you kill them, and you don’t really want to leave a string of unburied bodies behind, do you?


18. Always pack an extra pair of shoes. For some reason shoes seem to disappear easily and are hard to come by.

19. Always dress for the weather. Vampires seem to be impervious to hot and cold, and have no trouble dragging you through extreme temperatures.

20. Yeah, your vampire friend may not sweat, but they still need to shower. However, if they forget this, don’t try to remind them by suggesting they “smell like something dead”.

21. So, what do you do when you’re in a motel shower and – surprise – they’re too cheap to provide you with those little bars of soap? If you happened to pack shampoo you can always use that like body soap. However, conditioner doesn’t work so well.

22. If you forgot the shampoo, and the motel isn’t too cheap, you can always use bar soap on your hair. Doing that a lot will dry it out and make it look like straw, though.

23. Vampires don’t need TP – but you do! Keep a roll on hand, or even a travel pack of Kleenexes, for emergencies.

24. A container of wet wipes can also be very handy; you can use it to freshen up after sleeping in an abandoned barn, or to dab that splattered blood off of your face. On the plus side, there’s a fresh clean scent for you to enjoy!

25. Bottled water isn’t only good to drink, it’s handy for cleaning up messes; everything from left over carnage to those melted junior mints you accidentally sat on.

……………………………………….

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You can get the full copy at Amazon Kindle for $.99 or at smashwords – where you can set your own price!

  • Tales of the Executioners

    Short stories from the world of Amaranthine; a universe of blood and darkness where vampires don't sparkle and night is eternal. Each is about a member of the Executioners squad; the special vampire "police" force. Members both past and present share stories of assignments, origins, and more.

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  • Joleene Naylor

    Joleene Naylor

    An independent author, freelance artist, and photographer for fun who loves anime, music, and writing. Check out my vampire series Amaranthine at http://JoleeneNaylor.com or drop me a line at Joleene@JoleeneNaylor.com

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