Casting Call by Jonathan Harvey

Ha ha! I was doing some random google searches the other night and I ran into this old post by Jonathan Harvey that I wanted to share. Yeah, I am just going to steal it (images and all) and post it here because Jonathan is so cool he won’t care. You can see his original on his now abandoned MySpace though, and if you want to catch up with him he has a blog he occasionally posts in, a book he’s published called Shades of Plaid, and he writes the Terrible Turtle Conspiracy web comic.

**********

If you are looking for a book featuring Commando Cows of the Undead that fly around drinking blood from the udders of farm cows while dispatching bulls using submachine guns with extreme prejudice, then Shades of Gray by Joleene Naylor is definitely the wrong book. Shades of Gray is a delightfully gruesome paranormal romance that takes place during the dreaded war between vampire covens. The story’s heroine, Katelina, finds herself inexplicably caught up in a world of vampires. Not only does the poor woman have to grapple with the knowledge that vampires are real and that they want to kill her, but she also has to come to terms that the one who is sworn to protect her is a vampire himself.

Shades of Gray grabs the reader’s attention and keeps it throughout the course of the book. The story is well paced and well written. I was particularly fond of the villainy in the book. The characters were well developed. The book had a good balance of action and romance and the gore was at acceptable levels for a book of it type. I greatly enjoyed reading Shades of Gray and I am looking forward to reading the next book of the Amaranthine Series.

Now for the fun stuff! If they were to make a movie of Shades of Gray, who should be in it?

Jorick : The handsome vampire hero who protects Katelina! I’m thinking a dark haired Legolas, Orlando Bloom (Pirates of the Caribbean, The Lord of the Rings) should play Jorick.

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Katelina:  The main character of the story.  In the book the vamps are constantly putting her down for being plain.  This is a movie, so she should at least be pretty.  She should be pretty, but not overly sexy.  I chose Elisabeth Röhm (Heroes, Angel) she’s pretty not too young and she knows her way around science fiction.

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Oren is a friend of Jorick who loses most of his family during the Coven Wars.  He sticks with Jorick through the end.  He is the blond vampire.  For him I think we should cast Brad Pitt (Mr. & Mrs. Smith, An Interview with a Vampire).  He’s played a vampire before.  He was okay, I think he would make a decent Oren.

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Torina is Oren’s Sister.  She’s the sexy, red headed, femme fatale type.  I was thinking it would be cool to see Nikki Cox (Unhappily Ever After, Nikki) play this vamp.

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Jesslynn is the wife of Oren.  She is a proud dark haired and dangerous vampire coven queen.  I chose Angelina Jolie (Wanted, Tomb Raider) for this part.  She has the look and she works well with Brad Pitt.

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Kateesha is a treacherous and villainous vampire temptress whose alliances are questionable.  I  chose Aaliyah (Queen of the Damned, Romeo Must Die).  I know it’s type casting, but she was so darned awesome in Queen of the Damned.

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Patrick was Katelina’s old lover.  He’s killed off before the story ever really gets started.  Still, there are enough flashbacks of him that I thought why not cast him.  I’m thinking, why not James Marsters (Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Smallville)

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Arowenia  is Claudius’s plaything.  She gets kidnapped.  She gets killed.  She is the catalyst to all this vampire unpleasantness.  Like Patrick she really has a small role.  So why not cast Leslie Bibb (Iron Man, Popular).  She’s young, pretty, and blonde.  What more do we need?

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 Claudius is the big bad of the book.  He’s the guy that has who is so upset about poor Arowenia being kidnapped that heads are going to roll.  Cast for this role is Gerard Butler (300, Law Abiding Citizen).  Because “This is Sparta!” just kidding.  It’s madness.

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Well there you have it.  Shades of Gray is all cast.  This might not make you want to read the book.  But heck, I think I’ll be first in line to see the movie.

 What do you think of Jonathan’s choices? Who would you pick to play the characters? And do you think I should take his advice and add undead cows (LOL!)?
 

Dark Shadows Synopsis Released

Dark Shadows

Image via Wikipedia

Slated for a May, 2012 release, the remake of Dark Shadows starring Johnny Depp as the infamous Barnabas Collins looks like it’s going to not only be pretty faithful to the original plot line, but also just a darn good movie. Of course, I may be biased as I am a fan not only of the original franchise, but also of Depp and his efforts with Tim Burton (except Edward Scissor Hands.. I dunno, that one just didn’t “do it”)

And here it is:

In the year 1752,Joshua and Naomi Collins, with young son Barnabas, set sail from Liverpool, England to start a new life in America. But even an ocean was not enough to escape the mysterious curse that has plagued their family. Two decades pass and Barnabas (Johnny Depp) has the world at his feet—or at least the town of Collinsport, Maine. The master of Collinwood Manor, Barnabas is rich, powerful and an inveterate playboy…until he makes the grave mistake of breaking the heart of Angelique Brouchard (Eva Green). A witch, in every sense of the word, Angelique dooms him to a fate worse than death: turning him into a vampire, and then burying him alive.

Two centuries later, Barnabas is inadvertently freed from his tomb and emerges into the very changed world of 1972. He returns to Collinwood Manor to find that his once-grand estate has fallen into ruin. The dysfunctional remnants of the Collins family have fared little better, each harboring their own dark secrets. Matriarch Elizabeth Collins Stoddard (Michelle Pfeiffer) has called upon live-in psychiatrist, Dr. Julia Hoffman (Helena Bonham Carter), to help with her family troubles.

Also residing in the manor is Elizabeth’s ne’er-do-well brother, Roger Collins (Jonny Lee Miller); her rebellious teenage daughter Carolyn Stoddard (Chloe Moretz); and Roger’s precocious 10-year-old son, David Collins (Gulliver McGrath). The mystery extends beyond the family, to caretaker Willie Loomis, played by Jackie Earle Haley, and David’s new nanny, Victoria Winters, played by Bella Heathcote.

You can read more information on The Lexington Vampire Examiner, where I was lucky enough to find this at!

http://www.examiner.com/vampire-in-lexington/johnny-depp-s-dark-shadow-summary-is-released

You Asked For It…

okay, one person did, but hey, it’s too funny to ignore:

"Not a word, mortal... not one word..."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Special Sale and Fun Videos!

Yeah, it’s a “two fer'” post.

First I want to announce the exciting news that Shades of Gray, previously $11.00 in paper back, is now $7.50.

That's a $3.50 savings!!

GET IT HERE

Yeah, this is that “Pro plan” I talked about, though I opted out of the extended distribution for the moment because it means I’d have to leave the price at $10.50. And,  where as it does make the books available to book stores such as Barnes and Noble or Borders, the only way my book would be there is if someone walked in, went to the counter and said, “Hey, can I get Shades of Gray by Joleene Naylor?” And if they’re doing that, then there’s a good chance that they could have just gotten the book online. In the end, with shipping and handling, they probably pay the same amount, and have it there in the same amount of time, except that they then have to go back to the bookstore to pick the book up, vs having it dropped off at their door.

I don’t know.  I might enable it later, meaning that this $7.50 thing may not be around forever. So, if you haven’t got the paper back yet, now’s the time to do it.

On a side note, I’m still waiting for the prize books to arrive. They’re supposed to be here no later than Monday, which means Wednesday for us in hicksville, so cross your fingers.

And now for the videos I promised!

I found these from random postings on the CPC Vampire vs Zombie Challenge and wanted to share them. The first one is short but hilarious:

And here’s another spoof/parody that gave me a giggle:

And as a bonus, this one isn’t exactly vampire related, but it was catchy and amused me:

Vampire Parodies

While checking out some links sent to be by Jonathan, aka Jissilly, I ran across these two Vampire/Twilight parodies by Key of Awesome and thought they were amusing enough to share.  No matter what your opinion is of the Twilight franchise, you should still get a chuckle out of them.

*chuckling*

Dark Shadows Remake

Dark Shadows

Image via Wikipedia

Filming is set to start in February 2011 on yet another Tim Burton/Johnny Depp collaboration, only this time it involves vampires. Or a vampire, to be more specific.

Johnny Depp is slated to play Barnabas Collins, the romantic vampire lead in what used to be a daytime soap opera called Dark Shadows. The series originally ran from 1966 to 1971 and, though it has become infamous for silly sets, melodrama and mistakes such as boom mic shadows and corny special effects, has spawned two movies (House of Dark Shadows and Night of Dark Shadows) as well as comics, novels and radio programs.

What made the show such an icon? It was different. When Dark Shadows first introduced ghosts to the series, it was an unheard of idea for daytime television.  And then they introduced Barnabas Collins, the first “daytime TV” vampire, and the rest is history.

I first saw Dark Shadows when I was 11 via the 1991 remake series, which sadly lasted for only one season and cut off just when things got interesting. However, the new series had revived interest in the original version and soon the movies and the first series were on tv. I won’t lie and say I made it through every one of the 1,245 episodes, but I did watch quite a few of them and I have to say I’m more than looking forward to the revamp (pardon the pun), especially with Depp wearing the fangs.

Snagged from ebooblog.com

Oh yeah, a definite improvement!

  • Tales of the Executioners

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